Thursday, August 31, 2006 @10:33 PM
i was practicing for my organ exam today, and suddenly i had this desire to play "dancing queen", so i dug for the scores. and guess what? it's GRADE 6!! I CAN USE IT IN THE EXAM! wahlau. to think i had such a difficult time choosing songs. i could also have chosen the songs by carpenter.. BLEHH. i'm so stupid. but at least i like the songs that i have on my list of repertoire. (:
felt so slack yesterday. so this morning i woke up and did 2/3 of the chem volumetric analysis worksheets, the chemical energy photocopiable thingy, and copied out my salt preparation thing. haha. my acids and bases chapter is really bad. together with salts. but oxides are ok i guess.. argh! chem's supposed to be my good subject. i must jiayou and maintain an "a" grade! JIAYOU!! ADD OIL!!
hur. really busy next week, so don't mind if i hardly blog. but all of you must keep tagging!
bowl - i linked you already. smile!
@7:12 AM
had teacher's day celebrations today. was on duty. i guess it wasn't too bad after all. many parts of the performances were comical, especially during the surprise item by teachers. XP so funny to see them dancing.
i just realized how incredibly shy i can get. no, people, don't laugh. i can be VERY SHY. when i was giving flowers to my bluecactus (: she stared at me for a while before saying thank you. and at first i didn't know how to give flowers, so i was like "mdm lenny help me give can? ty!" and then she said no -.- i think it's very lucky i'm a girl. if not i would never get a girlfriend 'cos i'll be too shy to give flowers. for goodness sake, i don't even know how to give to a teacher! >< i am so hopeless.
after concert, ran around the school looking for our teachers.. alyba and i were lost! ok actually we didn't get lost. we lost each other. so she was stranded at the canteen. and ms hamidah refused to accept our rose! so in the end, when she was at the foyer, we decided to just stuff it into her hand, and we ran away. alvina had this weird look on her face. so funny. i was pestering people to help me find the last recipient of my roses. XDD and guess what. she wasn't in. so i was walking dejectedly down the stairs.. suddenly she materialized in front of me! XP no la, not so exaggerated. brenda pointed her out to me XP oh btw, the series of events in this paragraph did not happen in the order stated here. (: it was mdm lenny first, then blue cactus (: , then my "last recipient" and then ms hamidah. yea.
went to suntec.. again. but had lunch at videoworld first. came out, and we saw the clique. DARN IT! rannnnn across it road. it was fun practicing my sprints XDD and at suntec, we just played arcade as usual. percussion master and guitar game and para para dance. i helped alvina in getting her eeyore cushion. for further details, read alicia's blog. i'm too lazy to type it all out.
er. ok. suddenly i have no more inspiration to blog. tata.
Tuesday, August 29, 2006 @6:22 AM
haha. this post is dedicated to.. KAILING! haha. because she says my posts are emo. they're not lor! wth. -.-
but anyway. today was a pretty good but tiring day. got tired during ca period.. after reading the foxtrot comic. haha. then slept for like, three mins. hungry so went to eat. i got my rubik's cube back, by the way. mdm lenny said she didn't want to solve it anymore. sad. i bet she can do it! with practice (:
history elec. started getting REALLY tired. i'm so ashamed of myself, i nearly fell asleep! lol. alyssa "woke" me up in a sort of way 'cos when i started to daydream, she called me. 'cos i finished speedcopying and was sorta lying on the table. kept myself awake with smses. (:
same thing for chemistry.
a math. was kinda distracted halfway, so decided to focus on the lesson. and i'm proud to announce, i could do the binomial theorem amath homework questions!
people, motivate me to start mugging for the finals. they're so dangerously near.
and motivate me to practice for my organ exam! before my head's chopped off.
TAG! TAGGG~!
Monday, August 28, 2006 @5:51 AM
didn't know i'll feel so bad. didn't know i'll sink to such a level. time to start flying up.preparation for organ exam has gone horrendously. i play my best song like a freaking idiot. can't stand it. yet i'm not motivated. PEOPLE, MOTIVATE ME!
argh. lost my mood to blog AGAIN. damn it.
Saturday, August 26, 2006 @7:40 AM
i have weird addictions when i'm moody and depressed. but yea.
i must add oil for my organ exam! even my best song isn't good anymore.. celebration sounds so sticky! ARGHHH!!
i forgot what i wanted to blog about, but yea.
WHOEVER I HAVEN'T LINKED, TAG!
but even if i linked you, just tag.
Friday, August 25, 2006 @1:30 AM
av phototaking just now. wasn't even informed earlier today. wanna die can. ):
in library now, typing this. so sleepy. i suddenly have this urge to go to econ minimart and buy 100plus. and foood. (:
tired. and stomach ach-y. ))):
Thursday, August 24, 2006 @7:19 AM
just a quick update.i'm feeling really depressed now. amath is all the cause of it. can't believe i actually failed. i was hoping for a 20. and now. ): i feel lifeless. yea.
my withdrawal symptoms are still there and making me feel worse than ever! bad thing.
i attended training for the first time in a month, and i feel that my playing has become HORRENDOUSLY SUCKY. couldn't hit a couple of balls i would never have missed if i continued training. sigh. played matches and bobslap. wished my team would move closer and sit down quickly instead of staying there and blocking my view and my space for running. bahh.
candice owes me five bucks! XP 'cos she was in my team for bobslap, and we lost, so our penalty was to have "butts up" as usual. so we stood with our butts facing the opponents and they served, aiming for us. candice was like, "aiya! if hit my butt i pay you five dollars ah!" and suddenly, a ball hit her butt! HAHA.
ok this is senseless. but anyway.
my mom bought me a nice deuter slingbag for school! to help my back! <33
Sunday, August 20, 2006 @7:14 AM
shouldn't have ran xcountry yesterday. my butt hurts again. it's better though. i've been trying to keep off the painkillers. went for ballet today, did some pointe.. i think i really need to brush up.
been really slack these few days. dunno what's happening to me. i just hope the studious side of me comes back when i'm mugging for the finals. i want to score. and stop with the dumb stupid idiotic careless mistakes, like writing democracy as NATIONALISM. even in subjects like history, i make stupid mistakes. what the heck is wrong with me.
doomsday is on the 7th sept! 5pm. the date and time of the dreaded organ test. i think i need a lot more practice! i want a distinction.
i have so many goals and aims out, but can i do it?
Tuesday, August 15, 2006 @7:56 AM
i fully regret the previous post, so i've deleted it.
i went for service today.. and i realized how angry i was, yesterday. angry at what? nothing. basically, i'm just trying to say i have a horrendous lack of faith. it's surprising i'm going for confirmation at the end of this year. but well, halfway through mass my butt hurt again and i felt really bad.. it was then i realized how bad my attitude yesterday was. so yea, i said sorry. and i felt better. then i suddenly realized - since when did God forget to help any of his followers? DUMB ME.
just some random stuff.
i make far too many careless mistakes. even in non-practical subjects like HISTORY. i make the stupidest of all stupid mistakes. when a question is asked about source D and questions its reliability by asking "how far can you believe this source?", i said "this source is believable to a limited extent." notice the words "this source". ms hamidah said i should've written "source D" instead of "this source". i've got a feeling it would have gotten me at least one or two more marks. darn it.
and the other history paper before this one. the one on germany. democracy actually become NATIONALISM. sheesh. don't ask me why. it's just a careless mistake. a freaking careless mistake which failed me. i got a 6/13 for that paper.
ooh. and lots of people whom i have on my msn list have seen me around lately. yesterday benedict saw me on 101. i was sleeping like a pig! dumb. and today, jianda saw me at ah seah hawker centre. i was practically picking my food 'cos i wasn't hungry at all, but yea, in my family you've just gotta eat eat eat. that's one reason i liked xi'an.. when i was hungry, i'd eat. when i wasn't, i didn't have to. i skipped lunch twice over there.
i just took my painkillers. on a not-so-full stomach. hope i don't wake up in the middle of the night with sudden gastric pain.
Friday, August 11, 2006 @8:44 PM
now at alliance francais.
yesterday went for owen's concert at vch.. it was good! saw two cute guys XP and two guest performers were from russia! like wow.. they're professional! mom was whispering to me that russia provided really good education for the performing arts. and i must say, i agree. because the soloist's vocal range was almost two octaves! and the piano accompanist played like it didn't even need strength to play the piano. it was.. almost perfect.
didn't go to school yesterday. finally went to the doctor's. the verdict is out! i've got tight lower back, very tight muscles, resulting in muscle strain. and yep i've got long term mc for one week (whew!). i guess the cream and medicine does help. to all: please hope i get well soon! if not i'll have to go for an injection. BAHH.
k i hafta go now. please tag! (: have a nice day.
Wednesday, August 09, 2006 @6:46 AM
ndc duty - not as bad as i thought it would be. haha. isn't that good? got praised by the teachers somemore.. and the usual post-duty goodies! WAHAHA. but actually i thought we weren't fantastic.. the stupid mike stand freaked me out when it refused to be unscrewed. my hands were trembling la! in the end i just forced it down. instead of being patient with it. first time i couldn't handle an equipment. so sad.
after ndc, we (laura, alicia and me) went to suntec to watch pirates of the caribbean. i wanna watch it again la! so funny. it made me laugh. before the movie, me and alicia ditched laura ('cos she didn't bring her own clothes) and went to play para para. we left laura at the capsule machine shop.. fun lor! and after the movie, laura actually found her way out of suntec.. while me and alicia went to play arcade. the delightful percussion master (drums) and guitar machines! i'm freaking addicted can. withdrawal symptoms. expect a quiet ivy over the next few days. BAHH.
can't dance on sunday. sad. i'm not going to the doctor's anymore, 'cos i'm putting some cream thingy on it, and see whether it gets better, give it a lot of rest, if by sunday night still not fantastic, might THINK about going to a doctor. ><
Monday, August 07, 2006 @6:12 AM
damnit. i think i failed emath and hist elec. i was totally unprepared and several questions came as a shock to me. for emath, i lost 8 marks already. all due to the fact that i couldn't remember anything that i learnt in class. for hist elec.. i blanked out at the compare and contrast question. almost chewed my pen in an attempt to think. was distracted and tired and frustrated.. i think i'll fail horrendously. to think i only have one humanities.. why am i so lousy at humanities!? can't stand it.
been thinking about whether i should go to the doctor's. don't wanna get a long term mc..
Sunday, August 06, 2006 @7:00 AM
farewell was fun. but i'm missing all of the xi'an friends that i made.. sad. as usual stupid me had to go and change when their bus came. when i came out, the bus was at the gate, so i ran to the bus, managed to say bye to zhou yue and li xue and my dear partner, and then they were off. they were crying so hard, and so sad, that i wanted to cry too.. i kept telling zhou yue to save money and buy an air ticket to singapore. and that she could stay in my house. i wish we had more time to know each other better.. but yea. i will miss them. actually, i'm already missing them.
did some pointe for ballet today, but my tailbone really hurts now. it got better, but when i first got onto the car after ballet it really hurt. i'm gonna see a doctor if it's still bad.. but i don't want to. i don't want any diagnosis, i want it to just go away. argh. damnit man. it's making my passion for organ fly away. DAMNIT.
OH I ABHOR GUYS LIKE JASPER, NUT. i just.. dunno why.
Friday, August 04, 2006 @7:46 AM
busy week. i'm tired.
china gals have spent this week at school doing their own work.. and i got such a fat shock the other day when mdm lenny suddenly asked me about what they supposed to do. not to mention lowering the water potential in my mouth repeatedly as i tried to explain biology to the chinese teacher. but oh well. i made a brilliant discovery! cells in chinese in called XI BAO. (:
quite a couple of ca this week. hope i've done well in all of them. after all i tried my best.. especially for the two sciences.. not so much for chinese though. but i have no desire to fail chinese. the thoughts of what awaits me if i fail anything this term just traumatises me.
i feel like i'm gonna die! so many careless mistakes especially in physics, maths, a maths, the rehearsals i haven't been able to attend, the impending doom.. i feel like i'm being drowned in this world of things i'm so desperately trying to juggle. i've always been able to do it but now i don't seem to be able to. i don't want to be hamtam-ed by anyone.. esp the rehearsal-in-charge.
damnit. i don't feel comfortable around them anymore. i'm not even going for the bbq anymore. i just want them to all go away, maybe except one of them whom i really respect. oh my how am i going to face them anymore? so many things have happened this week i can't accept them all. and nothing is sinking in. i was so close today. i don't want everything that's been happening to just be absorbed suddenly, in an awkward position, and i'll just break down. that really nearly happened today, with all the shit. even the lenny lesson didn't cheer me up much.
