Wednesday, November 28, 2007 @8:52 AM
what i learnt and experienced in camp:
1. filled cambros are REALLY heavy.
2. excessive dishwashing causes backache but contributes to biceps.
3. logistics is like what andre says - really slack when slack, but really mad when mad.
4. logistics is fun but tiring.
5. lychee cordial is a no-no because it attracts gazillion ants.
6. my keyboard died halfway through pnw.
7. turns out the wire went haywire. XD
8. captains ball can be really rough.
9. most guys are fantastic ball players.
10. cleaning up is more chaotic than the camp itself.
i'm tired and frustrated.
but not exactly sad anymore. (:
Thursday, November 22, 2007 @7:11 AM
wahlau. the first time ever, i fought back. and i managed to crush 16 years in one hand.
family.
what is family?
a place where you never get to express your feelings?
a place where you tolerate and tolerate and tolerate whatever temper the family gives?
a place where you can't be yourself?
a place you never get to talk about your problems?
i didn't mind it when you threw tantrums during that period. i presumed it was the drugs. i let you have your way.
but now? i think that's no more an excuse.
i never know if i can crack the same joke more than once. one moment you can be happy, the next you'll snap.
you don't tell me what you want for me, what you want me to do. you should know very well by now, i'll try my best to do what you want me to. even though i don't like it.
you tell me it's ok i got this particular grade, and the next day you're telling me "no wonder you scored so badly".
you chuck solutions at me whenever i raise a problem. don't you ever have the feeling i just want someone to listen?
where were you when that stupid incident happened?
where were you when it almost happened again?
where were you?
was i such a good actress nothing showed on my face?
it has moulded me into what i am today, and i think no amount of talking will bring me back out.
nothing at all. ever since it happened i became an empty shell. how can i be a victim twice?
i can't feel that connection anymore. i'd rather go out alone.
Tuesday, November 20, 2007 @10:54 PM
yes, i'm finally more cheerful (:
anyway. prom was a blast! many thanks to all who helped to organize, the emcee, and all my friends and kids. and cassie's mom, alvina's parents, alicia's dad, for sending me around! XD
pictures (:
me and three kids and two family friends
me and my "gang" XD
haha. two pics only. but already, blogger is so slow. lazy to upload too ><
back to trying to clear my room of worksheets and notebooks and dust. i've seen so many worksheets the past two days i think i'm gonna puke if i see another one.
Thursday, November 15, 2007 @7:53 AM
asshole of a printer.
tried to fix it.
FAILED.
blinking on/off light, and i got owen's prez to finish up. and i need pictures. and i need to print them. and i need them by this week 'cos NEXT WEEK I WON'T HAVE TIME!!
oh man i feel like punching something now.
now, i shall run off for help.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007 @7:39 AM
o's are over.
hols are packed.
fun time today.
and i'm guilty.
very guilty.
and that kinda sums up my day for today.
not exactly happy.
Saturday, November 10, 2007 @8:12 AM
akio sasaki and sadao watanabe is love. (:
Friday, November 02, 2007 @9:25 AM
went for all souls' today.
and i got emo. 'cos i saw this indian woman, and she came up after blessing of columbarium so i think she had a loved one in there. the look on her face was .. indescribable. it's like, you can see that she's obviously still very hurt by the loss. but it's already made her numb. she wasn't even crying throughout the whole service, she just sat and stood with the rest of the congregation but she didn't do anything else.
just seeing her, makes me want to cry. and appreciate how lucky i am to have not have to go through this kind of pain yet, in my sixteen years on this earth. and how lucky it is to be able to take care of someone even though my temper does get the better of me at times, especially when i'm stressed.
and then halfway, i suddenly thought about her and the little one. who died. just because she was working.
don't you think it's really sad? you lose a kid, but you have to see people around you everyday with their own kids. everyday you get reminded of your own pain and loss, but have to pretend everything's ok.
almost losing someone is already so scary, i can't imagine how it feels to actually lose someone.
i hope he's in heaven.
me and three kids and two family friends
me and my "gang" XD