Thursday, November 22, 2007 @7:11 AM
wahlau. the first time ever, i fought back. and i managed to crush 16 years in one hand.
family.
what is family?
a place where you never get to express your feelings?
a place where you tolerate and tolerate and tolerate whatever temper the family gives?
a place where you can't be yourself?
a place you never get to talk about your problems?
i didn't mind it when you threw tantrums during that period. i presumed it was the drugs. i let you have your way.
but now? i think that's no more an excuse.
i never know if i can crack the same joke more than once. one moment you can be happy, the next you'll snap.
you don't tell me what you want for me, what you want me to do. you should know very well by now, i'll try my best to do what you want me to. even though i don't like it.
you tell me it's ok i got this particular grade, and the next day you're telling me "no wonder you scored so badly".
you chuck solutions at me whenever i raise a problem. don't you ever have the feeling i just want someone to listen?
where were you when that stupid incident happened?
where were you when it almost happened again?
where were you?
was i such a good actress nothing showed on my face?
it has moulded me into what i am today, and i think no amount of talking will bring me back out.
nothing at all. ever since it happened i became an empty shell. how can i be a victim twice?
i can't feel that connection anymore. i'd rather go out alone.
